A Side Table Note

I’m done.
I’m spent.
I’m empty.

I tried everything to experience a different fate.
I did all I can do just to steer clear from this path.
Unfortunately, I failed... failed miserably.

That is why I’m here,
rambling instead of celebrating.
Lying with my precious rubies drenched in white linen.

I’m tired.
I’m sick.
I’m bored.

I trace the very steps I have avoided for years.
I feel in my very core what I have felt ever since.
Now, I can say I did give it a try but it is the same.

Nothing is changed.
Nothing made it better.
Nothing at all.

I feel the rush escaping my body,
running away from its confinement.
I have decided that it is time for me to go.

Ready or not, I just have to.
No turning back now.
Finally, something I wanted is really happening.

For all my life were filled with silly disappointments.
From my unwelcome conception to my mediocre existence.
My life was a waste of space and time.

I was dead before my death.
I was finished even before I started.
I will be going away before my time.

The consolation I get is the bright light I see now.
The sound of angels singing in perfect harmony.
It assured me that I need not fear.

I will be welcomed there.
I know I will be taken in.
I will finally be loved.

How could I not be?
I ought to have a happy ending.
After all I went through, I deserve it.

As I take your applause proudly.
As I tearfully do my final walk.
I wave to all of you who cared.

I say “Thank you” for caring.
I say “I’m sorry” for not.
Enough words, enough jargon.

I bid farewell to you and you Sir as well.
I crossover with a simple thought and a smile.
Happiness is just 3 inches deep and 1 centimeter wide.